Almost an Antique

I am almost an Antique now. In my 90s I am closing in on 100 when I’ll be a Certified antique. However I can’t say I’ve improved with age as antiques are supposed to do. My whole face has changed-even eroded.

Some of my changes have been premeditated. Others have been a surprise but most have been a gradual melting away—like a snowman in the hot sun,

I‘ve had skin cancer since my 30s. They have been scraped, frozen and dug out, but one, on my nose required more work so I went to a facial surgeon. He operated on it in a artic-chilled room. But the cancer came back! So, in 2020 I went to another facial surgeon. He did more intensive surgery—removing an entire nostril. He cut down below my chin and across my upper lip. I was bandaged like a mummy. The surgeon then built me a new nose using cartilage from my ear. He did a great job and except for some small scars the nose looked almost normal.

My eyes used to be my best feature but I also had intensive surgery on these. Susan Ayers, my care-giver and also a nurse, noticed one day that I wasn’t making sense talking to her. She quickly diagnosed that I was having a stroke. I was rushed to the hospital, which was extremely crowded, but they hurried me into immediate care and began treating me. I remember being awakened several times in the hospital that night and asked my name, current date, name of President, etc. When I awoke the next morning I was in a different room. I had had a stroke in my right eye. I continued to improve but my right eye was useless. Almost a year later I began noticing leakage in my left eye. Conjunctivitis!!Though the nurses continued to treat it, it did not improve. The eye doctor examined me and then sent me to a specialist—an eye surgeon. When he operated on my left eye he discovered a bloody stone about the size of a BB far down in my eye under my left lid. He removed it and since then I have no more trouble. I never knew there were so many specialists!

These two operations (nose and eye) were my premeditated decline.

For my surprise decline let’s move on to my mouth and teeth. When I was in my 80s I went to a Dentist close to where I lived. She looked me over, took some x-rays and informed me that I needed to have all my teeth pulled and my gums worked on. This was devastating news. In tears, I went back to my former Dentist, Dr. Mustian. He told me not to worry, that he would take care of me and he did. But one day I was eating and something did not feel right in my mouth. I was surprised to discover that three of my top teeth had fallen out. True to his word, Dr. Mustian made me a partial plate and all was going well until a few weeks later, another surprise. Three of my bottom teeth had fallen out. However, on the advice of everyone here , I am not doing anything about them. They don’t show when I smile and I can eat almost anything.

Now we come to the slow decline—the melting away. My ears and hearing. For some years slowly—slowly my hearing has been declining. I have a set of hearing aids that I hardly ever wear and a wonderful Ear doctor who treats me here in my room. I am having more and more trouble hearing—not so much the volume but everything sounds muddled.

Other slowly changing objects on my face are the wrinkles (increasing), my sagging chin line, and the bags under my eyes. All my facial skin is very fragile and like a well used stuffed animal whose fur is being rubbed off, my skin is beginning to show spots where it has been rubbed away.

Sometimes, looking in a mirror, I have trouble recognizing myself: eyes, ears, nose, wrinkles, sags and spots